{"id":"01KG8AN0BK6GSE95XFC7HE8ZMF","cid":"bafkreih4eysv5fkjh76opor7fuda6lvme5zjls66km4jiapfpnbcehjntm","type":"chunk","properties":{"end_line":2268,"extracted_at":"2026-01-30T20:48:52.918Z","extracted_by":"structure-extraction-lambda","label":"Chunk 3","source_file":"01KG89J1JSYKSGCE149MH9HF6A","start_line":2225,"text":"new zest threw himself into the glowing practice of all those manly\r\nexercises, he so dearly loved. It almost seemed in him, that ere\r\npromising forever to protect, as well as eternally to love, his Lucy, he\r\nmust first completely invigorate and embrawn himself into the possession\r\nof such a noble muscular manliness, that he might champion Lucy against\r\nthe whole physical world.\r\n\r\nStill--even before the occasional reappearance of the face to\r\nhim--Pierre, for all his willful ardor in his gymnasticals and other\r\ndiversions, whether in-doors or out, or whether by book or foil; still,\r\nPierre could not but be secretly annoyed, and not a little perplexed, as\r\nto the motive, which, for the first time in his recollection, had\r\nimpelled him, not merely to conceal from his mother a singular\r\ncircumstance in his life (for that, he felt would have been but venial;\r\nand besides, as will eventually be seen, he could find one particular\r\nprecedent for it, in his past experience) but likewise, and\r\nsuperaddedly, to parry, nay, to evade, and, in effect, to return\r\nsomething alarmingly like a fib, to an explicit question put to him by\r\nhis mother;--such being the guise, in which part of the conversation\r\nthey had had that eventful night, now appeared to his fastidious sense.\r\nHe considered also, that his evasive answer had not pantheistically\r\nburst from him in a momentary interregnum of self-command. No; his\r\nmother had made quite a lengthy speech to him; during which he well\r\nremembered, he had been carefully, though with trepidation, turning over\r\nin his mind, how best he might recall her from her unwished-for and\r\nuntimely scent. Why had this been so? Was this his wont? What\r\ninscrutable thing was it, that so suddenly had seized him, and made him\r\na falsifyer--ay, a falsifyer and nothing less--to his own\r\ndearly-beloved, and confiding mother? Here, indeed, was something\r\nstrange for him; here was stuff for his utmost ethical meditations. But,\r\nnevertheless, on strict introspection, he felt, that he would not\r\nwillingly have it otherwise; not willingly would he now undissemble\r\nhimself in this matter to his mother. Why was this, too? Was this his\r\nwont? Here, again, was food for mysticism. Here, in imperfect inklings,\r\ntinglings, presentiments, Pierre began to feel--what all mature men, who\r\nare Magians, sooner or later know, and more or less assuredly--that not\r\nalways in our actions, are we our own factors. But this conceit was very\r\ndim in Pierre; and dimness is ever suspicious and repugnant to us; and\r\nso, Pierre shrank abhorringly from the infernal catacombs of thought,\r\ndown into which, this foetal fancy beckoned him. Only this, though in\r\nsecret, did he cherish; only this, he felt persuaded of; namely, that\r\nnot for both worlds would he have his mother made a partner to his\r\nsometime mystic mood.\r\n\r","title":"Chunk 3"},"relationships":[{"peer":"01KG8AJS0JNVAGJYMWXV1594N5","peer_type":"chapter","predicate":"in"},{"peer":"01KG89J1JSYKSGCE149MH9HF6A","peer_type":"file","predicate":"extractedFrom"},{"peer":"01KG89HMDZKNY753EZE1CJ8HZW","peer_type":"collection","predicate":"collection"},{"peer":"01KG8AMZMFAMEZ0JT3M5MWAZVS","peer_type":"chunk","predicate":"prev"},{"peer":"01KG8AN0BKQCY3C8PJM21M05MJ","peer_type":"chunk","predicate":"next"}],"ver":2,"created_at":"2026-01-30T20:48:55.667Z","ts":"2026-01-30T20:49:06.034Z","edited_by":{"method":"manual","user_id":"01KFF0H3YRP9ZSM033AM0QJ47H"}}