{"id":"01KG6GMRKY7PKTAH48V2P8KKP3","cid":"bafkreiaipw52vlpooukgbx3bojiidtevmqgzexejt74pl7kockkytsz7cq","type":"chunk","properties":{"end_line":9962,"extracted_at":"2026-01-30T03:55:03.883Z","extracted_by":"structure-extraction-lambda","label":"Chunk 20","source_file":"01KG6FXSCNX5F3D880P3YP3PKR","start_line":9893,"text":"by the way’--as he modestly received the money--‘have you any objections\r\nto give me a--a--little certificate--something, say, like a steamboat\r\ncertificate, certifying that you, a competent surveyor, have surveyed my\r\nchimney, and found no reason to believe any unsoundness; in short,\r\nany--any secret closet in it. Would you be so kind, Mr. Scribe?’\r\n\r\n‘But, but, sir,’ stammered he with honest hesitation.\r\n\r\n‘Here, here are pen and paper,’ said I, with entire assurance.\r\n\r\nEnough.\r\n\r\nThat evening I had the certificate framed and hung over the dining-room\r\nfireplace, trusting that the continual sight of it would forever put at\r\nrest at once the dreams and stratagems of my household.\r\n\r\nBut, no. Inveterately bent upon the extirpation of that noble old\r\nchimney, still to this day my wife goes about it, with my daughter\r\nAnna’s geological hammer, tapping the wall all over, and then holding\r\nher ear against it, as I have seen the physicians of life insurance\r\ncompanies tap a man’s chest, and then incline over for the echo.\r\nSometimes of nights she almost frightens one, going about on this\r\nphantom errand, and still following the sepulchral response of the\r\nchimney, round and round, as if it were leading her to the threshold of\r\nthe secret closet.\r\n\r\n‘How hollow it sounds,’ she will hollowly cry. ‘Yes, I declare,’ with an\r\nemphatic tap, ‘there is a secret closet here. Here, in this very spot.\r\nHark! How hollow!’\r\n\r\n‘Psha! wife, of course it is hollow. Who ever heard of a solid chimney?’\r\n\r\nBut nothing avails. And my daughters take after, not me, but their\r\nmother.\r\n\r\nSometimes all three abandon the theory of the secret closet, and return\r\nto the genuine ground of attack--the unsightliness of so cumbrous a\r\npile, with comments upon the great addition of room to be gained by its\r\ndemolition, and the fine effect of the projected grand hall, and the\r\nconvenience resulting from the collateral running in one direction and\r\nanother of their various partitions. Not more ruthlessly did the Three\r\nPowers partition away poor Poland, than my wife and daughters would fain\r\npartition away my chimney.\r\n\r\nBut seeing that, despite all, I and my chimney still smoke our pipes, my\r\nwife reoccupies the ground of the secret closet, enlarging upon what\r\nwonders are there, and what a shame it is, not to seek it out and\r\nexplore it.\r\n\r\n‘Wife,’ said I, upon one of these occasions, ‘why speak more of that\r\nsecret closet, when there before you hangs contrary testimony of a\r\nmaster mason, elected by yourself to decide. Besides, even if there were\r\na secret closet, secret it should remain, and secret it shall. Yes,\r\nwife, here, for once, I must say my say. Infinite sad mischief has\r\nresulted from the profane bursting open of secret recesses. Though\r\nstanding in the heart of this house, though hitherto we have all nestled\r\nabout it, unsuspicious of aught hidden within, this chimney may or may\r\nnot have a secret closet. But if it have, it is my kinsman’s. To break\r\ninto that wall, would be to break into his breast. And that\r\nwall-breaking wish of Momus I account the wish of a church-robbing\r\ngossip and knave. Yes, wife, a vile eavesdropping varlet was Momus.’\r\n\r\n‘Moses?--Mumps? Stuff with your mumps and your Moses!’\r\n\r\nThe truth is, my wife, like all the rest of the world, cares not a fig\r\nfor my philosophical jabber. In dearth of other philosophical\r\ncompanionship, I and my chimney have to smoke and philosophise together.\r\nAnd sitting up so late as we do at it, a mighty smoke it is that we two\r\nsmoky old philosophers make.\r\n\r","title":"Chunk 20"},"relationships":[{"peer":"01KG6GKZ3MPDDZB30GXGTJ7ATV","peer_type":"section","predicate":"in"},{"peer":"01KG6FXSCNX5F3D880P3YP3PKR","peer_type":"file","predicate":"extractedFrom"},{"peer":"01KG2T49K0H5GDRB0G4YDTPG8H","peer_type":"collection","predicate":"collection"},{"peer":"01KG6GMRKSFDWT6M5EH9H0VDMW","peer_type":"chunk","predicate":"prev"},{"peer":"01KG6GMRM1FD4HA19K1X2F75G8","peer_type":"chunk","predicate":"next"}],"ver":2,"created_at":"2026-01-30T03:55:10.334Z","ts":"2026-01-30T03:55:20.452Z","edited_by":{"method":"manual","user_id":"01KFF0H3YRP9ZSM033AM0QJ47H"}}