{"id":"01KFE0G1Z0QM0B2Y8STKFH8EH8","cid":"bafkreiaywntv6fj2yocu6s4c7a7epig7gd2xhn6lihhm43gdlxvkvmiowy","type":"file","properties":{"cid":"bafkreihif6dnyrvi2wu4gtcqe2nujykjkuk4cowumu5flx2fvceddiru4q","content_type":"image/jpeg","filename":"crimepunishment00dostiala_page_0401.jpg","key":"pdf-page-1768923071936-louf5qblst9","label":"crimepunishment00dostiala_page_0401.jpg","page_number":401,"pdf_type":"born_digital","size":209999,"text":"CRIME AND PUNISHMENT 393\n\"I too know it wasn't a louse,\" he answered, looking strangely\nat her. \"But I am talking nonsense, Sonia,\" he added. \"I've been\ntalking nonsense a long time. . . . That!s not it, you are right\nthere. There were quite, quite other causes for it! I haven't\ntalked to anyone for so long, Sonia. . . . My head aches dread-\nfully now.\"\nHis eyes shone with feverish brilliance. He was almost dehr-\nious; an uneasy smile strayed on his lips. His terrible exhaustion\ncould be seen through his excitement. Sonia saw how he was\nsuffering. She too was growing dizzy. And he talked so\nstrangely; it seemed somehow comprehensible, but yet . . . \"But\nhow, how! Good God!\" And she wrung her hands in despair.\n\"No, Sonia, that's not it,\" he began again suddenly, raising\nhis head, as though a new and sudden train of thought had\nstruck and as it were roused him — \"that's not it! Better . . .\nimagine — yes, it's certainly better — imagine that I am vain,\nenvious, malicious, base, vindictive and . . . well, perhaps with\na tendency to insanity. (Let's have it all out at once! They've\ntalked of madness already, I noticed.) I told you just now I\ncould not keep myself at the university. But do you know that\nperhaps I might have done? My mother would have sent me\nwhat I needed for the fees and I could have earned enough for\nclothes, boots and food, no doubt. Lessons had turned up at\nhalf a rouble. Razumihin works! But I turned sulky and\nwouldn't. (Yes, sulkiness, that's the right word for it!) I sat\nin my room like a spider. You've been in my den, you've seen it.\n. . . And do you know, Sonia, that low ceilings and tiny rooms\ncramp the soul and the mind? Ah, how I hated that garret! And\nyet I wouldn't go out of it! I wouldn't on purpose! I didn't go\nout for days together, and I wouldn't work, I wouldn't even\neat, I just lay there doing nothing. If Nastasya brought me any-\nthing, Iate it, if she didn't, I went all day without; I wouldn't\nask, on purpose, from sulkiness! At night I had no light, I lay\nin the dark and I wouldn't earn money for candles. I ought to\nhave studied, but I sold my books; and the dust lies an inch\nthick on the notebooks on my table. I preferred lying still and\nthinking. And I kept thinking. . . . And I had dreams all the\ntime, strange dreams of all sorts, no need to describe! Only then\nI began to fancy that. . . . No, that's not it! Again I am telling\nyou wrong! You see I kept asking myself then: why am I so","text_extracted_at":"2026-01-20T15:31:11.936Z","text_extracted_by":"pdf-processor","text_has_content":true,"text_source":"born_digital","uploaded":true},"relationships":[{"peer":"01KFCZZ05FKVDDMJJV3YE9Q4WH","peer_label":"crimepunishment00dostiala.pdf","peer_type":"file","predicate":"derived_from"},{"peer":"01KESYJX0Z6XE0HWTS5N3SDG0B","peer_label":"The Classics","peer_type":"collection","predicate":"collection"}],"ver":2,"created_at":"2026-01-20T15:31:12.741Z","ts":"2026-01-20T15:31:13.894Z","edited_by":{"method":"manual","user_id":"01KFCZWTBNJH4WFMS8354919KY"}}